Starting Over...

Wow, it’s been a while since I did this. It feels amazing!
Almost as if I am back in my apartment in Japan, all warm in bed with my hair messed up and ready to unleash my thoughts. Well, a lot has changed since then, I stopped blogging for almost 2 years, I am not sure why but mainly due to trying to settle back home and starting a new life after graduation. bla bla bla. Lame excuse, but yes, that's what happened.

I've been meaning to start again, especially seeing that my best friend is a constant blogger, love reading her stuff, so it inspired me to write again. Why today specifically? I do not know (yet). But let’s just say I am starting over.
So, whats new? Been home since 2009, trying to settle, isn't happening much, it seems like there are brick walls everywhere. Even when days seems so bright, and cheerful, and positive and just out of this world, there comes that brick straight in my face!

Got me thinking for days and days, how am I going to get over this, how to overcome this so called "culture shock in my own home". For now I do not have a solid answer but it made me think about all of us who've been abroad for "studies" and found it difficult to settle back. We talk talk talk talk, but when I sit back and watch how everyone’s life is at, we are all pretty much heading towards the same direction. A very steady typical life, staring straight into that damn brick wall.

In the midst of all my crazy thinking, I came across many realizations. The main one which, which brings me to the body of today’s entry, is the value of family. They are the most people I miss when away, the people who care the most, who worry the most, who call the most, who are always always there no matter what. As the eldest in the family, that much pressure is always on me and getting that little bit of independency gave me so much to give back to them which has strengthened my relationship with every member.

I know it may sound cheesy, but I feel good that when my little brother or sister say they want something, I can give it to them without them having to go to my mother all the time. It may be shoes, an ipod or even a big Mac, the fact that I can provide for my family means the world to me.

I was not very smiley when I started writing this piece but now I find myself smiling from ear to ear. It’s good to end things on a good note, that’s how I teach myself to be, trying to always to see the better picture of things.

Starting over, blogging again, my first entry dedicated to you, my family.